life in the usa – Page 4 – The Daily Satan

Ernie

October 22, 2022February 7, 2020

Nazis Then And Now

October 22, 2022February 5, 2020

When my Führer took over we waged war against an entire continent, ushered in a hysteria of nationalism, and with unprecedented zeal for cruelty brought about the “Midnight of Humanity.” Our evil knew no limits! Cool! When my guy won we triggered libtards on social media, cheered when he sold the country to Russians and Saudis, and defended his cronies as they brought about the “Happy Hour of Corruption.” Our only limits are the Twitter terms of service!

Happy Game Day, Fuckers!

October 22, 2022February 2, 2020

Go for it, Coach.

October 22, 2022February 2, 2020

Roid Rage

October 22, 2022January 31, 2020

After going on steroids, Julian’s balls shrank to the size of M&M’s and he can no longer maintain an erection - but goddamn he feels like a stud when he loses his self-control and beats his girlfriend to a pulp.

Brad

October 22, 2022January 29, 2020

Man: Are you 35, too out of touch to follow trends and too fucking empty to have any substance or character, yet yearning for a “niche” that will make you interesting to other, thoroughly uninteresting people? Be like Brad and become a BEER BRO! You can convince yourself that it’s cooler than being a wine connoisseur, and you’ll be surprised by how many people without personality will feign interest as you talk about s subject as tedious and hollow as “What I like to drink!” Brad: Artisanal beer - It’s like personality in a can, bro!

Respect The Flag

October 22, 2022January 25, 2020

How dare you disrespect the U.S. flag?

What Have You Done For Your Country?

October 22, 2022January 20, 2020

"Now you listen to me, goddamnit. This man has fought left wingers -- not in real life, on social media. But I'm telling ya, the guy retweets like it's nobody's business. And he's fuckin' OPEN CARRIED -- what? No, not in a war, in grocery stores. He can't join the army because he's too fat. He'll do anything for his country except exercise. But he has voted for OTHERS to go to war for him and -- Oh Jesus Christ. WHAT? No he doesn't want to pay more taxes to pay for the wars, he needs the money for iPads and shit. The point is -- the point is he's bought fuckin' bumper stickers. Alright? What have YOU done for your country?"

Meanwhile in America…

October 22, 2022January 14, 2020

Woman: We Texas gals believe in big hair, big tits and big jesus! José: And big asses! Woman: You just fuck right back off to Mexico, José... We have a wall to keep the racists in and the rapists out!

Its Own Kind Of American Dream

October 22, 2022January 13, 2020

Larry arrived at the 2020 adult entertainment convention with a mission - He would find Miss July, have her sign her centerfold, and maybe - just maybe - during that brief interaction she would see the kindness in his heart and fall in love. It was, in its way, its own kind of American dream.